I know how to save the world.....contd..

Right.......lemme explain my theory. You see..........the whole problem is...... The omnipresent paranoia about the climate, and associated campaigns about global warming and complete environmental  annihilation, have created a kind of hysteria in us. We are told that the only way to survive Armageddon is by turning ourselves into, tree hugging, cloud kissing, grass eating environMENTAList's.  And now after Copenhagen debacle, we have lost all hope and have come to a conclusion that, its better to kill ourselves before the sharks come and eat us.

Stop nodding like a donkey to whatever is told and think logically for a minute. I know "logical thinking" is hard, especially if, you ever went to a business school, or have read a single page from any kind of "Management" Literature, or if you watch the news regularly or if you have ever set foot in the United States of Americaland.......(dumbness is infectious the last time I checked). THINK people, THINK. When did the whole Global warming and environmental crisis start? How did it start? and more importantly whom did it start for?

Let me try and get to my point without frustrating you any further. I'll tell you how this dire issue can be resolved by answering these questions.

When did the whole Global warming and environmental crisis start?

Its agreeable that it all started during the Industrial Revolution, which itself was a result of the world wars. What happened after the wars is very interesting. All the technology that was invented and fine tuned to mass production during the wars was lying useless and then, someone, some avaricious bastard did the biggest mistake in history. He figured he could make household goods with the same machines and sell them incredibly cheap. But what he chose to manufacture has sealed the future of Humanity. He chose to make appliances that would help women in their daily chores. Don't call him a kind gentleman yet, keep reading. Kind or not, his products were a great success and thanks to the unbeatable marketing tool called "women's mouth" such products gained unimaginable popularity and demand. Soon every bugger was making completely redundant products like gas cookers, washing machines, dish washers sewing machines and all the rest. With time, the demand for, mass produced products that were unimaginably diverse, multiplied and notably, almost all of them were made for women.

You cant deny that, everything that the industrial revolution has introduced is meant for women. All we got is the electric shaver. That's it. But even that was made because, we had to look like pretty boys to please the ladies. Its for them that we chose to groom ourselves like plucked chicken. Back in the day, mullets and stubble's were the IN stuff. Men even wore pigtails for fucks sake. We dint care much about how we looked, until, the women saw some clean shaved, well waxed, smug looking posh boy in a few movies and advertising handouts and decided that all men should look like him to qualify as a civilized creature. And we obeyed.

Oh yes of course you might say the AUTOMOBILE was surely made for men. And that its the biggest culprit. That the car is evil and that its going to kill us all. We have all arbitrarily decided that the car has to to be punished for its crimes of polluting the Universe and making polar bears homeless.  The punishment it seems, is to ban petrol and run cars on Methane (which technically is animal fart), or air, some say vacuum, others say electricity , I say why not by power of "thought" or hey... pregnant monkeys' piss may be as good.

But think for a second before you blame the Automobile. Its the single most amazing innovation in all of human history. Its the ultimate manifestation of human creativity, intellect, vision and craftsmanship. Too bad we cant save it from extinction. Its destined to rust and end its glory in Museums and preschool coloring books. But what has it really done to deserve such a demise? What?

You see, cars were made basically to replace horse drawn carriages. Not just any carriage, but the ginormous, bling-mobiles drawn by 4 horses which, inevitably ended up shitting all over the rich peoples drive ways. So in order to avoid the embarrassment of stepping in horse shit, and smelling like it, at posh dinner parties, the super rich and the blue bloods found car to be a great alternative. Her Majesty the queen of Britain being an exception, soon everybody who was anybody in the society had a car. It was a symbol of prestige. It would have stayed so if it were not for our dear friend from the America screwed it all up(quite obvious considering his nationality). Henry Ford is his name and some think he's smart. I doubt.

Many people plainly believed when he told that he started the first mass production car Model-T in the 1920's because, he wanted to see everyone being able to buy a car. HE WAS LYING.

To be contd.......